Nov

The 9 Faces of Fear: Part 2

Val on November 13th, 2008

Part 2

Yesterday I spoke of the first 5 Faces of Fear in the post titled The 9 Faces of Fear: Part 1, and how I was able to overcome my fear of public speaking to do what I do now, which is being an inspirational speaker.

Today, we’ll talk about the next 4 Faces of Fear and I’ll offer the proven solution I spoke of yesterday.

Let’s continue where we left off yesterday:

Face #6: Distraction

This one usually follows on the heels of face #5 (Disorderliness & Disorganization). When you’re disorderly and disorganized, you will invariably become distracted. Distracted by what needs to be done, distracted by one pile of stuff or another, distracted by what someone else is doing so you don’t have to look at the piles in your office anyway.

Distraction is a success killer and a face of fear. Focus is its nemesis. Laser focus creates astonishing results.

Face #7: No Plan of Action

When I see unsuccessful folks, there is usually always a commonality: no plan of action. There is no plan to create success, no blueprint to follow, thus nothing happens. This is a face of fear because it is yet another way our crafty inner demons get to keep us stuck right where we are.

One thing is certain: if you have no plan, you will get nowhere.

Face #8: The Dreaded “I Don’t Know”

When clients give this answer, it’s a signal that they’re in fear, resistance and denial. We always know. Always. I believe you know everything you need to know to achieve high success. Whether you remember it all in this moment and take courageous action in harmony with what you know is another story.

Yet, you know. You always know.

When we feign ignorance, we’re in resistance and denial, which are just more faces of fear. The next time you hear yourself say you don’t know, ask yourself this question: what would I do if I did know?

Face #9: Overwhelm

This face of fear comes up when you focus more on the enormity of the task before you rather than focus on the rewards and benefits you’ll gain. It’s easy to fall into overwhelm when you look at all the things you’ve got to do and the little time you’ve got to do it all in. You wonder how you’ll get it all done in time, and you begin to feel overwhelm creep in.

You wind up saying ‘forget it’ and you walk away without doing anything.

You don’t consciously say you’re walking away. That would be way too obvious. You find something to distract you from the task at hand. Or you engage in time wasting activities that have nothing to do with your task, like meaningless chatter, cleaning out your desk, or getting another snack when you’re not even hungry.

So, what’s the solution?

Before sharing the solution, let me state that it will sound quite simple and easy. I know it’s not easy, and I’ll tell you how to make it happen for yourself. Here’s the golden solution:

DO IT ANYWAY!

That’s it. Whatever you fear, DO IT ANYWAY! This is the only solution I know of that works every time. It has never failed. It’s never failed because your fears are unsustainable, so when you dive into what you fear, the fear disappears. Fear only exists before you do a thing. Once you’ve done it, you no longer fear the thing you just did, even if you get fearful again when you get ready to repeat the action. In that instance,

DO IT ANYWAY!

How, Valerie, am I supposed to just DO IT ANYWAY when I haven’t done it yet?

Glad you asked.

There is one thing that will help you to DO IT ANYWAY:

Accountability

Get accountability to take certain actions that you know would catapult you to the next level of success. There are different levels of accountability. What works well (other than securing a life coach to support you in forward movement) is to call someone whom you highly admire and respect and ask them if they would be your accountability partner. Call the person and let them know you really admire them and their success and that you’re aiming for a new level of high success in your own life.

If the person has been an inspiration to you, tell them so.

Then inform the person that you’re starting a new success habit and you’d like to check in with them for just 15 minutes (of accountability) each week to apprise them of how well you’ve kept your commitment. Assure the person that you value their time and yours.

Most successful people love helping other people and you will probably get a positive response. Even if the person says no, it’s okay. Ask someone else you highly admire and respect.

The reason this form of accountability works so beautifully is because of an inherent fear most people have: the fear of looking stupid. You won’t want to look bad to the person you highly admire and you know that if you call them two or three times to inform them that you haven’t done what you said you were going to do, you’ll feel dumb, even if they don’t think so. You’ll do what you said you were going to do just so you won’t look or feel dumb.

It’s a great tool that works.

I’ve said enough about this now, so until next time, keep moving fearlessly forward and remember to